Exercise: 0
Breakfast: oats as usual
Lunch: a couple of sausage rolls while helping with catering
Tea: stove top Thai pizza

I have re read some of my older posts from my early days in the weight loss journey.
I eat heaps more now and drink almost twice as much.

I am disgusted with myself.

I have said it before and I will say it again.  Thank god for the sleeve.

Today I am grappling with the rest of my mother's family being excited because mum's brother and his wife (yuk) are visiting from New Zealand.

That bitch treated mum and dad (especially Dad) something shocking last time they were here.
To cut an essay short they are supposedly coming because they couldn't get to my aunts funeral and they are going to visit her grave and pay respects. We didn't hear from them when Mum passed away and they obviously don't give a hoot about me, dad or mum.

I love my cousins very much and I am finding it hard to cope with their excitement and my disgust.

Insanity

Tomorrow I am going to start with the Insanity program.
I will not be able to keep up with it but I will master it even if it takes more than the 60 days.
I think that is the way I want to train.
Plyometrics and own body weight resistance training.


We will see.

Thank goodness for the sleeve.

All my life I have been an emotional eater and I am so grateful for my gastric sleeve.  I imagine that if I didn’t have it I would be absolutely massive by now.  I have never been a great sweet  eater, I would rather eat cold casserole or a biscuit or a pastry than chocolate and lollies.  In the last couple of months I have eaten a power of mixed lollies and white chocolate and I have gained 2kg.  Yesterday I decided that this is not going to continue.  As hard as it has been I have not bought any more white chocolate or mixed lollies.  I have purchased little tubs of fruit and bananas.  The dietician has been keen for me to add more fruit to my diet so I have been having half a banana with my oats for breakfast and a little tub of fruit or apple when I get that sugar craving feeling.  I don’t feel hunger because of my surgery so it is all psychological.  I am still having less alcohol so that’s got to help too.

My diet this week is consisting mainly of homemade soup for lunch with multi grain bread and chicken with something for dinner.  Tonight I had a drumstick from the freezer (cooked previously) with cous cous.  I was supposed to have asparagus as well but I just plain forgot.  The soup is one I made on Sunday night.  I cooked 2 leeks with garlic until soft and threw it into the slow cooker with chicken stock, water, 2 large baked sweet potato, 2 baked carrots and 2 baked potatoes.  I got the very old bamix stick blender out to puree it with and the poor old thing was DOA, so I had to ladle it into jugs and the blender to mix it all up.  It is really yummy.  I serve it to myself with a teaspoon of light sour cream.

I purchased the biggest loser 3 DVD set of work outs and they are actually quite good.  I certainly felt sore after starting them.  Sometimes I find Michelle quite annoying though. I am still not consistent enough.

Looking after myself

This week, even though I been a bit weepy a couple of times, has been very good. I feel good about myself and actions I have taken.
I am looking after myself very well.
It would be very, very easy to fall into a pattern of eating badly particularly given that my stomach has been reduced in size drastically and I don’t have the “thing” that makes people feel hunger. That went with the rest of my stomach.
My healthy life depends more than ever on good food choices even though I can sneak feel good food in and not feel guilty.

I made a decision early in the separation that I was going to maintain my health and each weekend I cook something that I can freeze and eat through the week.

Today I tried one of those cook in a bag things that have been advertised lately, mine was Smokey bbq chicken.

  

It was so easy to do, just put eight drumsticks in the bag provided, add the flavour powder, tie a knot in the bag and pierce it with a fork and then cook for 40 minutes.
I know have 7 drumsticks to freeze for meals through the week.
I also have vegetable, pea and ham soup in the slow cooker.
In my freezer I have steam fresh veggies in a few varieties and something I never thought I would have which is frozen potatoes, some sliced, some mashed.
One of those bags of steam fresh veggies is too big for me but at least the chooks get a feed. Tonight I had peas, carrot and broccoli with re heated frozen mash(it was o.k too) and 1 drumstick. I am sooooo full, I probably should have stopped sooner. The dogs will get a bit of a feed out of the drumstick too.

Other things I have frozen include

• Chicken satay
• Lamb and apricot
• Savoury beef
• Lasagne
• pumpkin scones 
• veggie soup

 I have nearly finished the beef, scones and soup.

 So my diet goes something like this

 
Meal one:Oats with low calorie maple syrup and a splash of milk
Meal two:Soup and a buttered bread roll which takes me a while to get through
Meal three:Lamb & apricot with rice and veggies.

Even though I don’t feel hunger pangs sometimes I feel like eating, especially if I am not busy enough and I have been snacking on lollies but this week I decided that has to change and I bought fruit, yoghurt and muesli bars for those times. BUT I do have a bag of choccy frogs in the car. I won’t be buying them again because they are like wafers. I think they have lost more weight than I have.

Tomorrow I am treating myself to a roast!!

I have a little Lamb rack with three bones so I will probably get two meals out of it or share it with the dogs. Last time I cooked these it was for a dinner party, our last actually, and I stuffed them. This time I will just brown it off and finish it in the oven and serve it with sweet potato, carrot and broccoli. They are fresh veggies that I will cook too.

Can’t wait til tomorrow now.

I don't have to try anymore

......but that doen't mean I am going to take my eye off the game.
My BMI says I am still over weight but my looks don't reflect that.
More to come soon.

New Appointment

There has been a lot going on and I have organised my time next week to suit my surgeon only to get a letter saying he won’t be there on the day and I should make another appointment.  Now I have to organise myself for a trip to Melbourne a week later.

I won’t be at goal when I get there but I really don’t care, I hover between 58 and 59 on my scales which means about 60 on his. 

I am very happy with the way I look and feel right now.

59

Kerry, Jack and Reid

Downsizing again

Well I have been fortunate in my weight loss journey.

Last year I got a bit stuck and then my gall bladder nearly killed me and I lost more weight.
I then had my gall bladder out and lost a bit more.
Reid told me he didn't want to be married any more and I finally broke the 60kg stumbling block.
I am relying on all my supplements and medication at the moment as well as counselling.

Read my other blog if you need to know more.

Kerry

Green veggies..yum

When I am home alone I can eat what I like.
Tonight I had mixed asian greens poached in chicken stock and white wine with a bit of grated cheese and coriander added at the end combined with a lightly beaten egg.  It probaby sounds gross but I really enjoyed it.

I am having a glass or two of chardy as well.  :-)

Looking back and now looking forward

Look back at my photo the Saturday before I had my surgery.

I knew I was morbidly obese but I still thought I looked alright at the wedding even though I was on my pre - op diet and nearly ready for surgery.

I think I suffered from reverse anorexia: I always looked good in the mirror!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, finally I see some flaws but not many (bodywise), I will never be happy with the face.

When my BMI is in the healthy weight range I would like to have some photos taken but unless I am earning money they will be taken by my children.  I have very little to lose to get there but it just isn't happening soon enough.

I can go back to exercising very soon because my recoverey from surgery is about complete.  I will start with light cardio this week.  Next week I will attend my mix and match class and if I feel o.k after that I will go back to the gym.

Keep your finger crossed.

kerry

Infection

Well now I know why I was so sore.
My wound was infected and my skin is sensitive to the sticky dressings.  OUCH!!!!!!!!

Two different antibiotics and two visits to my GP later and it's nearly o.k.

On Friday I will go to the surgeon and let him check it all out.

It's not quite right so we'll see.

I've lost another kilo or two but can't quite get to 60kg.  I have been so close but I haven't hit it yet.  Soon, very soon.

It's time

to grow my hair back.
Having short hair from hair loss sucks.

I have had my gall bladder out 5 days now and to be honest it was a much harder thing to go through than the gastric sleeve.

I'm still sore.

Random photos of me with members of my family

Approximately 5

kilograms to go before I am in the healthy weight range for the first time since 1990. yayyyyyyyy

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Time to update the photo

People have been gasping lately when they see me.
I think it's the hair really. The regrowth from all the hair loss was quite fuzzy so I had it all cut off.
Dad got quite emotional when he saw me and said I looked like Mum. Everyone knows I am a dead spit for Dad. LOL
Reid and I had our photo taken together a couple of nights ago when we officially gave up being Mayor and Mrs. Mayor so I will try to get one of those to post soon.

Sunday Night on Channel 7

I am disgusted with this show's article tonight.

I tried to respond to it but I wasn't able so I am doing it here.

I have not had lap band surgery but I would have if my surgeon hadn't offered something else.

I fully support lap band surgery and gastric sleeve surgery.

How dare Mike Monroe throw so much shit at lap band and support one doctor.

I'm sure there are lots more positive stories about weight loss surgery than they portray.

If you are not convinced google weight loss surgery forums and you will find plenty of happy people.

I have lost so much weight, I am fit, I am healthy, I don't take blood pressue medication, I am not diabetic and I love my life. Twelve months ago I was the exact opposite of all of those except for diabetes. How good is that. I have life to look forward to. I have grandchildren to look forward to, once I had limited opportunities due to my weight.
I can still die tomorrow, like anyone else but at least i am not offering myself up to the gods as a candidate to be taken early.

Express Lane

I'm in the express lane to the end now with my gall stone problem that I reported in my moving forward blog. It's just dropping off everyday with no fat allowed in my diet. I am trying to balance the nutrition side of things so that even though I eat tiny meals they are at least good for me. Annette Sym's cook books are coming in handy because she makes everyday meals low fat and tasty. There are always lots of veggies and good protein sources so I think I am covered reasonably well. I haven't been this light since before I had children (Jack is 18 now) so I feel really good. I am going to try my Wedding Dress on one day soon but I think it may be a bit big.
For the first time ever I have slim legs. All my life I have had heavy legs and generally been fat all over. I have the legs I have always dreamed of, go figure how this happened but I am glad it has. Perhaps all those leg exercises I did when I was a serious bodybuilder :-) have paid off and left a legacy, who knows.
Any nutrition tips will be gratefully accepted as well as your version of what has happened to my legs.
Kerry

Is that Mum with Dad?

My son Sam left for King Island on July 13th and we didn't see him until last Saturday when we were allowed to visit him. He didn't recognise me until he spotted Reid but wasn't sure if I was me. He straight away said that he thought I had lost a lot of weight. He was quite shocked really.
Next week he will be home for the holidays and he will get to know us all again.

Compliments

My life is full of compliments at the moment and I am loving every minute. I am no longer obese and I look like magic.
The lady at the coounter in Target told me I looked gorgeous with no other conversation taking place and me not knowing her from a bar of soap. She has no idea how that made me feel. I thanked her of course be she will never know how much I meant it.
I have had some clothes taken in to make better use of them and I have also purchased new things.
Someone on a forum for the gastric sleeve asked once if you had a food addiction and you get the sleeve what takes the addictions place. The answer is shoes.
I l0ve shoes and skinny feet fit much better into pretty shoes than fat ones do.
Now I am not so heavy I can handle heels much better and the last two pairs I bought have quite big heels. I am weary the black ones to an engagement party tonight and I hope to have at least one good photo taken in my outfit. Can't wait.

Kerry

anit movement

Still steadily progressing on the downward path but not as quick as if I were exercising regularly. I don't kmow why I won't because I love the feeling of finishing a workout, especially cardio. I'm good at cardio, I never get bored, I always mix it up and always finished pleased with myself, so why don't I like to start it.
I suppose somewhere in my head there is a bit that has decided to take the easy out and just let the sleeve do everything for me. ?????????????????????
My eating habits have certainly changed.
I don't crave anything really.
I choose healthy options even if the portions are small.
I have an occasional treat.
I love the new body I am developing so you would think if I could get there quicker with exercise I would just get off my butt and do it.

Move, Kerry, move.